Get happier… be nice!
This is our long-time friend Nyoman. He lives on the island of Bali, and is one of the kindest people I have ever met.
His laughter kills me.
When he laughs – I start too – we end up in hysterics. And it’s funnier because my Balinese is terrible and his English is only so-so, so we keep setting each other off.
I asked him why he is always so happy.
His answer? He doesn’t do things that make his heart worry.
He doesn’t lie (even white ones), cheat, push (even metaphorically), hurt (words or actions) or treat anyone other than how he would like to be treated.
In plain English – that means – he’s nice.
He’s also not a push-over.
He is nice to himself as well as the rest of the world.
He set’s kind boundaries, says ‘no’ in a lovely manner, problems solves with grace, and meets challenges with optimism.
What to do?
Do nice things, think benevolent thoughts, say kind words.
Don’t make your heart worry.
Want to get happier? Reduce your stress and get into ‘flow’.
When I was a kid, we had DoodleArt. Great big posters that I spent as much time colouring as playing Kick-the-Can. (Dating myself big-time.)
It’s why we LOVE colouring books. Coloring is a stress-free activity that relaxes the amygdala — the fear center of the brain — and allows your mind to get the rest it needs. (And this one has a great title! And yes – we carry it :-))
When coloring, we activate different areas of our two cerebral hemispheres, says psychologist Gloria Martínez Ayala. “The action involves both logic, by which we color forms, and creativity, when mixing and matching colors. This incorporates the areas of the cerebral cortex involved in vision and fine motor skills [coordination necessary to make small, precise movements]. The relaxation that it provides lowers the activity of the amygdala, a basic part of our brain involved in controlling emotion that is affected by stress.”
In simplest terms, coloring has a de-stressing effect because when we focus on a particular activity, we focus on it and not on our worries. Sound familiar? Yup – it’s an amazing form of meditation. Colouring regularly has similar benefits as a meditation practice.
When we take school supplies to aid our the foundations we support, we take crayons and pencil crayons; not felt pens. Why? Because the plastic case becomes waste as soon as the felt pen has dried. When colouring – think about which tool you will use. Call me overly-enviro … I don’t mind 🙂
Our favourite colouring books… yup, you can get ’em at The Oracle.
The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts. ― Marcus Aurelius
It’s all in your mind.
You already know that ‘thoughts are things’ and that what you think about is what you create in your life. Want to be happier? Think happy thoughts.
But it’s not that easy, because research shows that it takes 5 happy thoughts to counteract 1 negative thought.
Not only that, but negative thoughts have more staying power – they stick longer and offer something to dwell on; while happy, positive thoughts flit through. Delightful one moment – and ‘poof’ gone in the next.
Positive thinking won’t work for you if:
- You like the negative. There is a certain drama and attention that often goes hand in hand with ‘problems’.
- You can’t find the ‘good’ in a situation. And maybe there isn’t one. But you still have the rest of your life to be happier.
Positive thinking will work for you if:
- You WANT to be happier.
- You are aware of your thoughts, and can find the good in a situation or be able to move past conditions.
Notice your thoughts. When you find yourself thinking negative, actively search for FIVE positive things to counterbalance the gooey negative.
Put ’em in the bank.
Don’t wait for a negative though to push it’s way in. At random times throughout your day, mentally list out 5 positives; or as many as you can come up with. Your general outlook will dramatically improve.
With our thoughts, we make the world. ― Buddha
In this photo, I have just experienced an elephant kiss. It is the equivalent to a soggy vacuum cleaner.
I nearly piddled I laughed so hard.
As daylight decreases, starting in the fall, people tend to have more feelings of depression, anxiety; often which feels like stress.
- Happiness is a choice.
- Happiness is impermanent. It arises and subsides. You can choose to return to ‘happy’, when you are ready.
Be brave, try something new, it doesn’t have to be an elephant smooch, but something that could cause a good giggle, open your mind to a different perspective, or experience learning.
Don’t live the same year 75 times and call it a life. ~ Robin Sharma
The pursuit of happiness is just a notion, it all happens right here – with you.
Abraham Lincoln stated “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”
Happiness is a result of many things, including: the people in your life, the things in your environment (home & workspace), your own choices and actions, and the thoughts in your head.
You have a great deal of control over your personal level of happiness.
Of course sad things happen, anger arises, and suffering exists. Happiness is never going to be a 24/7 thing. Tears of sorrow are the human gift that helps us appreciate our joy-filled times.
Happiness comes from what you envision and how you propel yourself.
When you think positive thoughts and do worthy things, you find that the splendid rewards is happiness. ~ Living Peace
Being happy is waaaaay more fun that being miserable. Way more fun. In fact it’s what makes life worth living. Being happy, sharing happy times with others. Hugely fulfilling this happiness thing. The other stuff is a bit of an inconvenience. Being happy is where it’s at.
I think of myself as a generally happy person. I choose to be that way because it’s more fun than being miserable. This doesn’t mean that there are no sad or tragic times, or that anger and fear never emerge, it means that when they do, I embrace them, accept them, and allow them to subside as the emotions that they are. (And sometimes I hang on to them for a day or so and make everyone around me miserable too. 🙂
Our emotions are always changing. Moment to moment and day to day one emotion will replace another. Freedom comes when you begin to recognize that how you feel in this moment is not how you will feel in the next – or tomorrow. Time truly is a healer. If emotions are not permanent (and they aren’t) – then there is no point in attaching drama to this instant. Once you begin to detach from the agony, you can better face the reality.
Through self-awareness, you can boost positivity and reduce negativity without ‘pulling an ostrich’ and burying your head in the sand. Ignorance is not bliss; it is lack of responsibility and is actually disempowering. You can experience much greater joy when you honour situations as they occur (good or bad), and instill the possibility for change, hope, or acceptance.
- Develop self awareness and practice mindfulness.
- Practice gratitude many moments throughout your day.
- Get a good night sleep.
- Take ownership of your happiness. It has nothing to do with people, things or situations.
- Don’t harshly judge yourself or others. There is no us and them – only ‘us’. If you really need to compare yourself – try holding yourself up to an earlier version of yourself.
- Embrace your shadows and work to brighten them.
- Take responsibility for your emotions, they have nothing to do with anyone else.
- Take responsibility for both your successes and your failures.
- Challenge your beliefs. Don’t believe everything you think.
- Practice forgiveness. There is no hope of a better past.
- Keep promises you make to yourself, or give yourself permission to let them go.
- Keep promises you make to others, or let them know at the earliest possible moment that you can’t keep that promise.
- Focus on nourishing your relationships.
- Look after your ‘self’ body, mind and spiritual well-being.
- Look outside of yourself – give yourself away. Making others happy – makes you happy.
- Make choices that are geared towards what brings you happiness and what amplifies your happiness.
- Recognize that ‘this too shall pass’.
It is unrealistic to expect to be happy 24/7, but to cultivate an underlying sense of well-being that springs into happiness at any given moment is a solid objective.
The 3 Happy Moves:
- Move your body: Exercise even a little bit.
- Move your mind: Learn or experience something new.
- Move your spirit: Explore the possibility of things beyond what we know. Discover magnitude.
The BONUS to happiness: We often think of happiness as a result, how we feel after something wonderful has happened, but happiness is also a source of motivation and inspiration. Happy people accomplish more. If you want to be more productive and fun to be around, then get happy.
You can find more tools to cultivate happiness and peace of mind at Living Your Peace >>
You help us, help others… we wholeheartedly support local community efforts and are actively involved in our countries of import through our ‘Finnigan the Frog/Be the Change’ funding efforts. This month we delivered 20 pounds of crayons to the kindergarten at Sukawati Village on Bali.
We stood back, because as you can see, the little guy at the front was in tears, and afraid of us… but boy, could he colour!!!
“A child must know that he is a miracle,
that since the beginning of the world there hasn’t been,
and until the end of the world there will not be, another child like him.”
~ Pablo Casals
By Tessa Sweeney: The Question Newspaper / November 29, 2012
This November, seven children from Colonia Leonardo Gastelum participated in a Be the Change beach clean up to help sea life after Hurricane Paul. During the adventure, the kids shared the organization’s mascot, Finnigan the Frog. They loved the small toy, took good care of him, and gently gave him back at the end of the day.
Seeing this, and discovering their lack of toys has inspired The Oracle to collect small stuffed animals to take to Mexico. Many of the families of Colonia Leonardo Gastelum moved from mainland Mexico in hopes of employment opportunities and a better life. However, upon arrival, they soon discovered a lack of jobs and an unsustainable desert environment. With no water, electricity, agriculture, sewers or schools these people endured severe challenges.
Over the past two years, the local government has granted them status and a school. They have water trucks delivering water approximately once per week. Last April, The Oracle, along with the Ray Thomas Group opened the doors to a school kitchen that currently feeds 100 hungry school children every school day. Volunteer moms run the kitchen and the food is generously donated by various grocers and corporations.
The Oracle wholeheartedly supports local community efforts in Whistler and Sechelt, and is actively involved in the countries of import; most notably, the children of Colonia Leonardo Gastelum, at BCS, Mexico and Sanggar Anak Tangguh, educating children in Bali, Indonesia.
Many people have asked me how they might more actively participate in the creation of a critical mass of consciousness. Gandhi said, “You must be the change you want to see in the world”. If you want to “be the change” in your community, I invite you to begin by hosting meetings to talk about how you can create a better world through personal and social transformation. Interested individuals can agree to meet once or twice a month to share a common vision and achieve many goals. Together we can make it happen. Thank you for being a part of this global effort.
Celebrating Change in BC: A Regional Community Celebration (2009)
Featuring: Deepak Chopra and distinguished guests and performers
An inspirational gathering dedicated to a vision to create a critical mass of consciousness to heal ourselves, our community and the planet through personal and social transformation.
Facilitators: Deepak Chopra, Pepe Danza, Kelly Oswald, Kali & Patrick Brauckman, and Rachel Andrew-Nelson
Generously supported and sponsored by: Whistler Wellness, Whistler Question, Tourism Whistler, AVW TelAV.
Experience: Workshops: Intuition – Live the Magic!
Sound Healing. The Key to Powerful Relationships, Tools For Accessing Your Life Purpose, The Spirit of Laughter in Daily Life, Miracle of Names: Numerology, The Power of Rhythm
Benefit: UNICEF’s relief efforts in Darfur, Africa
Venue: September 9/10, 2005, Maurice Young Millennium Place, Whistler BC
Kelly Oswald – Emcee, Lyndsay Smith – UNICEF, Cheryl Brewster, Baeleay Callister, Clayne Coning, Dolan Gadoury, Hugh McLelland, Shasta Martinuk, Brian Hoover, Zoey Wren